sani a yadda komai ya fara a tsakaninmu? akwai tarin irin tunanin da kike yi akaina, na san an gaya miki tarin abubuwan da ba lallai ne na iya ?
aryata miki su ba, kinji wanene ni ta bangare da yawa na sani Amina, kuma har nima na bada gudunmawa wajen saka miki wani tunanin akaina tun a wancan lokacin, wani abu da nayi shi ne ba don komai ba sai don in hana faruwar auren a tsakanin mu."
Yayi shiru ya cigaba da kallon fuskarta, kuma ganin yanayinta bai canja ba yasa shi cigaba.
"I'm a mess Amina, akwai tarin abubuwan dake gabana kuma a tsakiyarsu ne na tsinci zancen aurenmu?wanda ni tun bayan lokacin dana rabu da Ru?
ayya ban kara tunanin cewa zan sake aure ba, abubuwa sunyi min yawan da bana son nauyin komai ya sake ?
aruwa akaina, saboda haka wannan wasi?
ar da na baki nayi ne don in tsorata ki ta hanyar da zai sa ki ?
i yarda sabida su Baffa baza su saurare ni ba a lokacin, abinda na manta a wannan lokacin shine ban isa in canja ?
addarar da Allah ya hukunta ba tunda hakan babu abinda ya canja."
A wannan lokacin numfashin dake ?
irjin Amina ya kasa tsayawa waje guda, sai kokari take dashi kamar kifin da ya fito daga rywa yana wutsil-wutsil, hasken fitukub dakin ya karu a idanunta yayin da wata iska ta shiga busuwa daga maka-makan windunan dskin kasancewar a sama suke.
"Daga ranar da na fara ganinki Amina, nayi nadamar abinda nayi, na san cewa ban kyauta ba da har na saka wannan tsoron da na gani a cikin idanunki, wanda duk da hakan kuma bai hana ki kyautata min ba, bai hana ki nuna min kirkin ki da kuma halayenki na gari ba, kuma yanzu wannan kirkin naki nake kwaWayin cigaba da samu Amina, ina son nutsuwar da nake samu a wajenki don itace babban abinda nake bukata wajen tafiyar da rayuwata a yanzu, shi yasa nake rokonki da ki manta duk wani hasashe da kike yi kaina Please, ki bani damar da zamu yi normal life kamar yadda kowa yake yi, wallahi nayi alkawarin ba zan taSa cutar dake ba insha Allah."
"....Kamar yadda na faWa miki mafitar ta riga tazo hannunki Amina, Kilishi ta bude miki kofar samun nasarar da ita kanta bata sani ba, so nake ki dauki dukkan maganganunta kiyi wa taki zuciyar ado dasu Amina, don takunta zaki bi, dukkan abinda ta fada kema shi zaki yi, banbancin da za'a samu tsakanin ke da ita shine, ke ita zaki yiwa Amina, ita zaki lulluSe da rigar amincinki ba kowa ba, ita zaki zamewa farar wutar da ba zata taSa sanin cewa ?
onata kike yi ba.
Kuma hanyar farko da hakan zata kasance shine idan kika sami soyayyar mijinki..."
Kalaman da Amma na Wazu su suka biyo bayan dukkanin bayanin Ma'aruf a cikin kan Amina, ta tuna yadda take kallon Amman cike da ?
arin bayanin da bata furta ba Amman ta cigaba.
"Kilishi ta gaya miki cewa soyayyar mijinta ta fara samu a saman ta kowa, shi ya fara yarda da ita kafin ta buWe zuciyar kowa ta fara aiwatar da manufarta, idan baki sani ba yau ki sani Amina cewar ta?
amar kowacce mace a duniyar zuciyar mijinta ce, idan taci riba anan to wallahi duk girman wata matsala koda kuwa ta mahaifiyarsa ce ta tsallake ta.
Yaron nan ya riga ya zama mijinki a yanzu ko munso ko bamu so ba, don haka kije ki ?
ara dagewa, ki dage wajen kyautata masa har zuciyarsa ta ?
ara yarda dake akan yanzu, sannan da zarar kun koma kije wajen Kilishi ki tsugunna ki gaya mata cewar kin yarda da sharaWinta bama sai lokacin da ta gindaya miki yayi ba, ki ?
as?
antar da kanki a gabanta ta sigar da ba zata taba iya haska cikin zuciyarki har tayi wani hasashe ba, waWannan sune matakan farko Amina, kuma ina tabbatar miki idan kika tsallake su, dukkan sauran zasu zo ne bi da bi kuma a sau?
ake..."
WaWannan sune kalaman dake saka sa hannyenta rawa a Wazu, sune kalaman Amman dake rikita lissafinta suna gaya mata cewar ba zata iya dorar da wani abu akan Ma'aruf ba tunda bata gama sanin tunaninsa akanta ba... Sai gashi tun ba'aje koina ba hanyar farko tazo mata da sauki.
Allah ya amsa addu'ar ta, Ma'aruf ya cire dukkan wani kokwanton dake zuciyarta da waWannan iya kalaman nasa, a yanzu ta yarda cewa shi da gaske zuciyarsa wankakkiya ce akansa, abinda take ta taraddadi daga bangaren Hajiya Kilishi yake dama.
Taji yadda mamaki ke cinye zuciyarta tun daga ?
asa, ashe komai ba mai wuya bane kamar yadda Amman tace, kowacce mace tana da irin nata ikon a hannu, kawai burga da barazana ce ke saka wasu yin ?
asa su yarda cewa an fisu su baza su iya ba, gashi tun basu ko bar garin nan ba ta fara samun yardar Ma'aruf a hannunta, idan haka ne kuwa ta yarda da maganar Amma na cewar da gaske Kilishi ta kiyaye su, don ko ita a yanzu tana jin ?
arfin gwiwar cewa zata iya.
Kuma cikin wata irin sa'a, sai ya ?
yale ta bai nemi amsarta ba har suka kammala cin abincin da komai.
Wajen ?
arfe goma sha Waya saura Amina ta dunkunkune a karshe gadon Wakin har a lokacin tana ta faman sake-sake a ranar, don ko ka kaWan ba bacci take ji?ba, abubuwan da ta fuskanta a yau suna da yawan da har yanzu basu gama narkewa a cikin ranta ba. Ta juya bayanta ne tana kallon Waya gefen Wakin yayin da hannunta ke wasa da ?
arshen bakin mayafin nan data yafa a akanta.
A yanzu fitulun Wakin duka a kashe suke, Ma'aruf ya kashe su kafin ya shiga toilet don ta riga shi kwanciya, sai da ya gama aikinsa tana kwance tana sake-sakenta sannan ya tashi ya kashe fitulun duka ya shiga toilet din.
A yanzu babu wani haske sai na waje da yake shigowa cikin Wakin, kuma wucewar minti biyar kawai sai kofar toilet din ta buWe, hasken fitilar ciki ya ratsa duhun Wakin kuma duk da ta juya bayanta sai da hasken ya shiga idonta kafin taji ya rufe ?
ofar duhun na sake dawowa.
Taji gadon ya motsa yana shaida mata hawowarsa zuwa daya gefen da sanda yaje jan sauran bargon da ta rufe ?
afafunta dashi zuwa nasa jikin.
Sakan Waya, biyu, suka wuce tana cigaba da wasa da mayafinta kafin taji muryarsa, can ?
asa a hankali kamar duhun daren.
"Amina..."
Ya kira sunanta kamar wannan ne karo na farko daya fara faWa, yadda tunaninta ya tsaya cak haka ma daren ya tsaya, kamar shima yana jiran amsar da zata bayar ne.
Tayi kokarin haWiye wata busashshiyar iska a makogwaronta sannan tayi dauriyar amsawa a hankali.
"Can I hold you.. ?" (Zan iya ri?
e ki?)
Bata san me take tunanin a wannan lokacin ba, bata san ma me taje yi va ko kuma abinda yake faruwa a cikin kanta, ta san dai kawai zuciyarta ta ?
irga wucewar wasu sakanni ne data san cewa jiranta yake yi kafin duk wata dauriyarta ta rinjaye ta wajen Waga kanta a hankali.
Kuma bata san ya akayi yaji ta ba, don a lokaci guda yasa hannunsa daya ya janyo ta zuwa jikinsa, ya juyo ta tana fuskantar sa yayin da hannunsa Waya ya zagaye waist Winta, sannan Wan kaWan ya ratsa ?
afafunsa a tsakanin nata.
Ya hade ta da jikinsa har tana jin kara bugawar zuciyarsa kamar kaWawar igiyar ruwa a bakin teku wanda sautinsa ya haWe da amon tata zuciyar, ya zama idanunta basa ganin duhun daren sai wanda ke tsakaninsu kawai, numfashinsu ya hade waje guda yayin da ?
amshin turare da kuma sabuntar kayansu ya cika hancinta.
Kuma bai isa Ma'aruf ya gama rikita zuciyarta ba sai da ya sunkuyo da fuskarsa daidai cikin wuyanta ba shiri kuwa jikinta ya shiga girgizawa gabaWaya a cikin nasa, kuma ga mamakinta sai taji yayi wani abu kamar murmushi sannan a cikin kunnenta ya furta maganar data rikito da duniyarta bakiWaya ta rugurguje.
"Kar ki damu, not now, not here." (Ba yanzu ba, ba anan ba.)
Shikenan! Ma'aruf ya gama da rayuwarta!
***
Kano.
09:30Am
No. 58 Mafara Street, NNDC SharaWa Quaters.
"Wai har kun dawo?"
Surayya ta faWa a lokacin da ta fito dafa daki tana kallon Amina daje zaune a tsakiyar falon nasu tare da Sameerah wadda ta cika gabanta da kayan breakfast.
"Tun wajen ?
arfe takwas fa suka dawo. Yayan har ya tafi aiki ma." Sameerah ta bata amsa lokacin da take hada nata tea din.
"Auren ma'aikacin kamfani na da wuya ko?"
Surayyan ta fada tana kallon Amina lokacin da tazo ta zauna a kusa da ita tana Waukan pillow Win kujerar zuwa cinyarta.
Da murmushi a fuskar Amina tace.
"Gashi nan dai, ni ban saba ba har yanzu."
"Gaya min zaki yi idan da wuya tun wuri in kori Tahir."
Kafin ta amsa Sameerah tace.
"Ki kore shi ma, don Wallahi Baffa yace ba wanda zai sake yiwa aure a gidan nan sai man da shekara biyar. Su Salma sun karya tattalin arzikinsa."
Dariya kawai Amina tayi tana kallonsu lokacin da musun da suka saba a kullum ya kaure tsakaninsu, don ma wai Munaya na can Sangarensu ne.
Sai dai duk yadda dariyar tata ta kai akan lebbenta kawai take, don daga can kasan zuciyarta taraddadi ne fal da kuma tunanin abinda ke shirin faruwa.
Don kamar yadda Samirah ta fadawa Surayya ne, tun wajen karfe takwas da ?
an mintuna na safe suka iso garin Kano, don Ma'aruf ya gaya mata cewar yana da tarin aikin dake jiransa a office, kuma ya sauke ta a gida ne ya tafi bayan ya rungume ta yayi kissing saman kanta lokacin da suka shigo ciki ya buWe mata gidan da mu?
ullin dake jikin na motarsa, sannan ya juya ya barta tana kokarin hada zuciyarta waje guda ya koma wajen motar tasa da ya bari a waje.
Kuma shigarta gidan ya sake tsayar da zuciyarta waje guda, yana tuna mata da kalaman Amma.
"...da zarar kun koma kije wajen Kili???? 

 !"#$%&'()*+,-./0123456789:;<=>?@ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ[\]^_`abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz{|}~?shi ki tsugunna ki gaya mata cewar kin yarda da sharaWinta bama sai lokacin da ta gindaya miki yayi ba, ki ?
as?
antar da kanki a gabanta ta sigar da ba zata taba iya haska cikin zuciyarki har tayi wani hasashe ba, waWannan sune matakan farko Amina, kuma ina tabbatar miki idan kika tsallake su, dukkan sauran zasu zo ne bi da bi kuma a sau?
ake..."
Zuciyarta ta gaya mata cewa wannan lokacin shine zaiyi daidai da zuwanta wajen Hajiya Kilishin, don a yanzu ne zata yarda cewa da gaske zuciyarta ta wanku wajen yarda da ita. Shi yasa ta tattaro dukkan dauriyarta ta taho cikin gidan inda Sameerah ta shaida mata cewa Mamin tana wanka.
"Kin gama? Mamin tace tana jiranki a ciki."
Muryar Sameerah ta dawo da ita zahiri, ta Wago tana kallonta daga can jikin hanyar koridon dakin Mamin, ta san lokacin da Surayya ta tashi ta shiga ciki amma ita bata san lokacin da ita ta tashi ba, taji zuciyarta ta buga a cikin ?
irjinta amma kuma sai fuskar Amma ta gifta a idanunta ta kore hakan, ta gyara yafen mayafinta sannan ta mike a hankali tana zagaye table din da Sameerah ta cika da kayan breakfast din, kafafunta suka taja cikin korido din lokacin da Sameerah ke gaya mata cewa ta tafi ta shiga wanka, kanta kawai ta gyada mata kafin ta rike handle din kofar dakin.
Da dukkan addu'o'in da zata iya karantowa a zuciyarta ta tura kofar dakin, kuma kamshin turaren wutar da taji tunda ta shigo dakin shi ya fara shiga hancinta, ta hango shi kuwa yana ci daga can kan bedside drawer dakin daga cikin wata haWaddiyar burner irin wadda Sameerah ta taba kai mata.
Sai taji ta shaki wata busashshiyar iska a makogwaronta lokacin da ta hango Mamin, tayi wankan kamar yadda aka fada ta shirya cikin wata doguwar rigar atamfa da aka baza mata stones tana ta kyalli, kamar ?
yallin dake son nunawa duniya cewa ita kadai ce Kilishi irinta.
?
afafunta suka karaso ciki da sallama, sallamar da Mamin ta amsa da murmushi a fuskarta, murmushin nan nata mai nauyin da sai a yanzu Amina ke jinsa a saman kafadunta.
"Ashe ?
an jigawan har sun dawo, yaya kuka tarar dashi Amina?"
Takaicin da ya taho ya taru a kirjinta wani abu ne da ba zata iya misalta shi ba, amma haka ta daurewa masa ta amsa.
"Jikinsa da sauki Mami."
Kuma sai da ta jira ta nemi bakin gadonta ta zauna sannan kai tsaye muryarta ta sake fitowa.
"Mami na yarda da dukkan zancenki, na yarda zanyi dukkan abinda zaki sani ba tare da wani ya san komai ba, dan Allah kar ki sa a sake taSa kowa a cikin ?
anuwana, raunin dake jikin Aminu yayi yawa, dukkan kafafunsa biyu sun karye... Zanyi dukkan abinda kika ce da yanzu Mami don ni kaina ina son rayuwata ta inganta, na mi?
o miki hannayena kamar yadda kika umarta don ba zan taSa yin katoSarar yin ganganci da rayuwar iyayena da ?
anuwana ba, darajarsu tafi komai a wajena."
Muryarta tayi shiru na wani lokaci sannan ta sake ratsa shirun Wakin amonta na rawa.
"Na rantse da ubangijin daya halicce ni Mami, zan yi miki biyayya kamar yadda kika umarta, baza ki taSa dana sanin bayyana miki sirrina ba insha Allah."
A cikin Wakin wani irin shiru ya sake giftawa, irin shirun nan mai tsantsar zurfi, zurfin da a cikinsa zukata ke sa?
a abubuwa da yawa, kamar yadda zuciyar Kilishi ke saka mata dubunnan abubuwa a wannan lokacin yayin kallon Amina take da dukkan irin nazarin da ?
wa?
walwarta ke iyawa, tana jin yadda a bayan kanta wasu kofofi ke buWewa kuma tunaninta na nutsewa cikinsu na son gano wani abu daban saSanin abinda bakinta ke furtawa.
Sai dai duk iya kokarinta, ta kasa gano abinda yake saman fuskar Aminan, a wannan lokacin, don tsoro da kuma rudanin da take gani karara suna fitowa tare da kalamanta, kuma takaicin yadda ubangiji ya biye sirrin kowacce zuciya ya kamata, don baza ta taSa yarda kai tsaye cewa yarinyar nan ta karbi tayin ta kai tsaye haka ba, amma da yake ita Kilishi ce, sai tayi gyaran murya a hankali sannan ta faWaWa murmushin dake kan fuskarta, a kusa zata gane komai ba sai anje da nisa ba ta yiwa kanta wannan al?
awarin.
"Shi yasa na barku kuyi tafiyar nan dama Amina, don so nake kije ki ga Wanuwanki ki san cewa babu wasa a al'amarina kamar yadda na jaddada miki komai, kuma Alhamdlilah naji dadi sosai da idonki ya buWe kika fahimci gaskiya tun a yanzu, tun kafin mu shigo da wasu cikin lissafin."
Muryarta ta fito ne da wani irin sanyi kamar ?
an?
arar dake narkewa a cikin ruwa, Kuma da faWin hakan bata jira komai ba sai ta taso, ta wuce ta ta nufi wardrobe Win dake dakin. Wajen da ta bude na farko ya nuna mata ajiyar da tayi na wata bakar jaka, ta dauko ta sannan ta sake buWe wani wajen inda jakunkunan ta suke a jere, kuma a cikin aljihun guda Waya ta?Wauko Sachet mai yawa na wani magani sannan ta rufe komai ta juyo, da takunta a hankali ta sake dawowa wajen da Aminan ke zaune akan carpet, inda daga gabanta akwai wani stool da aka bari a wajen, ta ajiye wannan jakar da kuma magungunan a gaban Amina sannan ta nemi kan stool din ta zauna kafin muryarta ta sake ratsa dakin.
"Komai mai sau?
i ne Amina, umarni na kawai zaki dinga bi shikenan sai duniyarki ta koma kamar aljanna, don zan cika miki dukkan wadannan alkawuran dana dsukar miki har ma da karin wasu da bamu lissafa ba, Kin fahimce ni ko?"
Kuma kamar yadda ta zata, sai ta Wago ta kalle ta idanunta na shaida sauran tsoron da a lokacin dama ya kamata ace yana barin fuskar tata, ta gyaWa kanta sau biyu sannan ta sake maida shi kasa, kuma abinda Hajiya Kilishi ta gani a idanun nata ya shiga barazanar goge kokwanton da take yi akanta, amna tayi wulli dashi a lokaci guda.
"Yayi kyau, yanzu ki saurareni sosai kiji abinda nake so dake."
Amina ta sake gyaWa kanta tana ?
ara gyara zamanta lokacin da Muryar Hajiya Kilishin ta cigaba da shiga kunnenta.
"Akwai abinda zanyi a kamfanin su Ma'aruf cikin satin nan, kuma zan yi shi ne ba tare da yana nan ba, don haka yanzu za ki taya ni abinda ya kamata ace ni zanyi don dama lokaci yayi da hakan zai koma hannunki.
Abinda ke cikin jakar nan magunguna ne, na san an gaya miki cewa Ma'aruf yana da wata rashin lafiya ta ?
wa?
walwa, sunanta 'Bipolar Disorder' ya same ta ne a shekarun baya lokacin da rayuwarsa ta canja bayan rasuwar Wanuwansa, cuta ce dake canja tunaninsa a duk lokacin da ta tashi, abubuwa suna cakuWewa a cikin kansa har baya sanin abinda yake yi.
A London ake yi masa magani tun daga wancan lokacin kuma suna Wora shi akan ingantattun magunguna tun daga sannan, amma da farko Ma'aruf bai karbi ciwonsa hannu biyu ba balle har ya dinga kula da kansa, baya taba shan magungunan sa akan kari wanda hakan ke ?
ara bawa ciwonsa bigiren yaWuwa, tun kafin yayi aure nake yi miki wannan zancen Amina kuma tun a sannan na karSi magungunansa na ajiye a wajena.
Ma'aruf kamar Wan dana haifa na dauke shi, kin sani tun a wancan labarin dana baki, don haka a baya na tsaya da ?
afata sosai wajen takura masa a duk lokacin da ya kamata yasha maganin, kafin daga bisani na fahimci cewa hanyar nasarata tana tattare da ikon da nake dashi ne akan magungunan sa. Ina son Ma'aruf Amina, amma son da nake yiwa cikar burina yafi karfin nasa, shi yasa nake rufe idona a duk lokacin da bu?
atar in kwantar dashi ta taso min ina yin hakan."
Tayi shiru na tsawon wasu sakanni tana kallon yadda tasirin maganganun ke aiki a fuskar Amina kamar yadda ta zata kafin ta cigaba.
"Magungunan dake cikin jakar nan har America naje na nemo su Amina, magunguna ne dake birkita ?
wa?
walwar mutum a lokaci guda ya fita daga hayyacinsa, kuma dama ciwon Ma'aruf abinda yake bukata kenan ya tashi, don haka duk sanda nake shirin yin wani abu da na san zai iya zame min ?
alubale, sai in kwantar dashi in gama duk abinda zan yi kafin ya dawo hayyacinsa."
Ta kai karshen maganar kamar bata karasa ba,