I was lying on an italian royal bed in my bedroom. My phone is the S22 model next to me, I am listening to the recitation of the Holy Qur'an in the design of Muhammad Hosary, my eyes are closed like a sleeper, the cold acn that blows follows all the doors of my hair, while on the other hand my nose breathes the sweet smell of the incense I lit in a burner that is not even thick because of the way I wear it.

I was wearing a long, lightweight material dress, the dress was one of the clothes I loved so much in my clothes, although the material was not expensive, my face was bare, but it came out with more holes in my face.

In general, today I feel like I am sick and it seems that I have died, but there is none of them in it, since the morning when I woke up, my mouth has no taste of anything because of the severity of the next fall, I have been worried about it, that's why since then I have been praying and glorifying, and reading the Qur'an that I played while listening to and following it, he misses me, he misses me however, despite that, I feel in my body that there is a big issue that will shake my world soon, I feel like this will almost be the end of everything in my life.

My heart dropped heavy, I turned my bed where I am now facing the entrance door, in my heart I am asking the Lord why everything will happen to be good, and he gave me the ability to pass any kind of test and be able to take fate.
the silver ring in my hand was looking at me and I felt something big, while thinking of some years made my face disappear with a wide smile, a smile that will be called that of war.

I took my phone to check the time, it showed me at five o'clock in the evening, I sat up and was surprised by the speed of the time in my heart and said "up to five?, the world is really running, God forbid we will be filled with faith".

With determination, I put my feet on the ground and fixed my little collar, I felt as if I was going to fall because of the lack of motivation, like someone who had diarrhea and picked her up in one day. I stood in front of the mirror of the room and stood taking a tissue to go in to wipe the stomach because of the eye pain I have been suffering from from since last year until today.

I stopped looking at myself in the mirror, if there is life and age, then there will definitely be a change, all of me seem to be not me, one look you will give me, you will not have to add the second one, you will see the pure youth on my face, which will tell you that my age is not many. However, if you have been happy with me in the past, then now you will say that I have changed, not a change in behavior and behavior, but a change in physical structure. In the past, I was a warm girl with a beautiful body, tubarakallah, I have this kind of body that has no color of worry, let alone hunger, unlike now and everywhere in my body, bones and nerves are talking, and the eye is the hole that brought him out. the bottom of the owl, the side of my cheeks is all deep inside, the father of the light that I did was nothing but my revenge, and my chest resources were all lying down like a woman who nursed a hundred children. four in the world.

At the same time, my eyes were filled with a lot of tears, but they did not manage to pour, in a state of pity, I bowed my head to the ground, feeling a lump of things, I stood in my throat and passed by, and that became a pain. for me, the one I would have been able to get rid of with my mouth or passed by himself, maybe I would have been relieved. In my usual courage, I raised my head and turned back the pile of balls that filled my eyes, I was just looking at the room, even if it was limited, a servant was left to live enough for him to enjoy and enjoy life, his worries disappeared, not to mention that you are living in this house where he is, you say in the European countries, I am in a kingdom, anyone who comes to my house does not want to go, the wealth is wasted in the construction of the house, you will swear by God that it is not the world where the poor live, if God does not stab with mercy, the devil will keep you busy with worship.

Many times my friends and relatives tell me that you are looking for Sa'ida, you are not quick to be sad and disappointed in the world because God killed and gave you wealth everywhere, look at the house you are in as if you will not die, the kind of cars that are going out in them alone make you fat and fresh, daily food and meat, you don't seem to have any more worries, they don't know that it's not here at all, it's a lot of things to die in the market, it's only with peace of mind that you enjoy.

I looked at the mirror in front of me carefully, I let out a big sigh and smiled painfully, I was surprised by those who told me such words, I don't know if they are only looking at the limit of the empire that God has placed me in, that's why they never notice that there is a difficult challenge on the side, I don't enjoy the house, I'm not happy at all, I'm not happy at all, they couldn't see the damage I did, they couldn't understand what my past life was about now, they couldn't understand that I needed their help. They think that I can do anything for them since they call this big house Sa'ida's house, they don't know that there is nothing I can do, because I have nothing, since everything they are looking at is not my property. It is not my pride.

Money, life and health are mercy, money is everything after health, there is nothing better than today being stronger than anything else, if today you are the one who takes it and gives it, not to take it or not, eat it well and sleep in good less beautiful and expensive clothes, get on a plane and cross the fog to where you want, take it and kill no one to determine for you, deal with the people you are looking for. But what?, despite the wealth you have, and the kind of empire you live in, as long as there is no peace, there is no happiness and happiness. In my opinion, it is better to live in poverty than to have a lot of wealth, but there is no peace, no peace, let alone peace of mind.

I let out a heavy sigh for the third time, I gave a smile that hurt me the most and shook my head which I know the meaning of. One thing I let myself know is that every level of success is not increased without challenges, and everything in the world is white, and trust in God is capital, and there is no one who does it except God, as long as there is today, tomorrow and the day after tomorrow, everything will pass away and become history. I fixed the binding of the potato on my head, took the perfume and applied it, and then coldly after his death I went out of the room feeling my feet as if it were on the ice.

in a hurry and unhappiness in my mind that I didn't realize the time I went out, I know wherever Hubbi is now he is on his way back home, maybe he came back and I didn't wear it, since these days I don't know his return if I don't stay I didn't do it, as I won't know how to get him out, even if I don't eat food, I've never been negligent, the food that if I do it is not good for him or I will be left with my things, but all that won't make me stop, I will try to discharge my rights. I cooked since it was bought and kept. I'm coming out of the bedroom or down and I'm not going down because I'm going to waste more time.